Does Technology Cause a Child To Become Unsocial?

echnologies are blessings, no doubt. Everyday I find myself lucky with the sweet services of computer, internet, mobile….along with bunch of other electronic appliances…. But at the same time, I find some frustrating scenario around me. Which is might be depending on the proper use of technology. While the handling insecure, it causes dangers in many many ways just like it cause comfort to us….

Let me come to the point I want to focus on. I would tell you two scenarios.

Scenario 1
I have a cousin of 14 years… All the time busy with computer games. He has one or two gaming partner from their neighbors… and that’s it! He is impossible to accompany his Mom to visit to any relative’s home. His attitude is becoming more and more painful gradually. Whenever he is told to stay away from computer, he start breaking glasses and does some terrible activities at home. Sometimes his Dad manages him from outbursts…. but it lasts moments only! That day aunt was crying sitting next to me for her child. I just felt how pain is in her,but I can do nothing. My cousin isn’t any psycho patient, but surely he is freak with computers and gaming. He has no friends other than one or two even school! Don’t mix with others at the classroom! I feel sympathy for him, more for his parents 😦

Scenario 2
This is about a girl, my neighbor (not in university area!) and relative of a distant relation 😐 . Her age most probably 16. Did terrible result in Secondary exam. Her parents couldn’t find any reason of that because she had private tutors in all the subjects! She started crying to her father for bringing her a cell phone in reference to her friends.. they all have it! Like all Dad in world, being melted he brought a brand new cell phone. After few days, she was found to be found to be talking over phone in the midnight. Later investigation resulted that chatting over cell phone made her friends(!!) with whom she even met several times… The same breakdown scenario to the parents… sobbing… crying… on and on.. no perfect solution…..

Scenario 3
We have several classmates, who cannot mix with us for many complexities in them. We tried hard to let them learn the sweet university life, but such psychologically-ill guys never bothered us. They have got a solely different concepts and views on life and friends. The huge open and wide campus failed to be a blessing for them for even a minute to mix with people and to melt the glacier of superior complexity regarding their rich family background…

Though these people have very few moments to pass with friends, very few words to chat in campus, they are very frank in virtual world! In a social networking site like facebook, they just rock (!!) with some virtual friends. For this reason, in a reply to our a motivation, one of those unsocial friends said,” I have many good friends in facebook, how can you tell me unsocial?” πŸ‘Ώ

Gosh! There is not even 1% possibility for them to be social 😯 But these people thought themselves so much social and smart to communicate by just passing few times on photo sharing and commenting on status updates!! πŸ™„

Not only them, I had to think about some other specimen (friends and neighbors) who are frequent and smart in virtual world of internet. strangely enough, most of them are so introvert and has very little capability to mix with people.

What is cause of such problems actually? How these things can be resolved? I can’t draw a conclusion 😦 ……. Can you?


Author: mahmud faisal

Yet another ephemeral human being...

32 thoughts on “Does Technology Cause a Child To Become Unsocial?”

  1. This is a very thought provoking Mahmud and I don’t feel there is one single solution to all problems as each individual is different! Anything hs its pros and cons and we can’t blame technology altogether!

    About the first cousin, I think he hs already got used to leading this life just playing with comp and Xbox and stuff! Well, even I feel bad sometimes that children don’t have as many options as we had to go out and play etc.. but we can definitely introduce them to the benefits of outdoor games, mingling with friends etc.. from an young age .. its not impossible atleast! We can take them out for the games they are interested in. It definitely wil minimize the time they spend on the PC. I think one solution might be to give the cell phone to them only when they are out and need one to contact people @ home. Ok, it might look odd to take it from them and keep it hidden @ night but then u atleast keep them away from all such midnight conversations!

    And abt some ppl being introverts, I have many such friends who converse over the virtual world frequently but are not comfortable mingling with people when it comes to the real world. Is just abt their level of comfort πŸ™‚ So, they might nt hv a problem commenting on FB etc.. I don’t find a problem with that πŸ™‚

    Phew! Long comment πŸ˜› Ends here πŸ˜‰

    Abt cellphones, I totally agree its not required @ an young age but @ 16 yrs, if the girl is responsible enough and knows that she alone can make/break her life, she can never go wrong! For that matter, I ws given a cell phone too pretty early in my life bcoz all of us used to be away from home and that ws the only way we cud contact each other and also I cud let them know when I wud be home in b/w college, music classes and so on! I agree teenage is a period when there are many changes, there can be distractions but when a person knows where he hs to draw lines, technology is gng to be a boon only!

    1. Swaram, thank youuuuuuu a lot! πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚ πŸ™‚

      so sweet comment of course….. I liked your concepts…
      and big comment makes me empowered 😎 so be cautious okay? πŸ˜‰
      next time I might produce some more discussion on which topics I still feel confusions..

      You didn’t feel problem with ppl of the part 3.. please know that they don’t feel uneasy, they don’t know how to be easy… I tell you, these ppl are governed from their family since childhood that who are not like you are bad boys πŸ˜€ just imagine! one of them mentioned it before… therefore while he is in virtual world, he do not feel that these ppl is not like them. i still feel them ‘unsocial’ and allergic about them trust me. becoz among the 3 scenario above, I am suffering of the 3rd one… they are simply rubbish πŸ‘Ώ

      thanks for long comment again and… mine is long too πŸ˜›

  2. I totally second Swaram!

    Many people see technology as the problem behind the so-called digital divide. Others see it as the solution. Technology is neither. It’s how we perceive it. Every aspect has its advantages and disadvantages; so is the law of nature. What we can do is try to maintain a balance and get the best of what it has to offer, be it nature or technology.

    1. Apu,

      actually… you told one thing perfect

      it’s how we perceive it

      I totally agree with you.. but i think there are certain problems in our technological life like I mentioned above…. where you will be in dilemma what to do.. once you are in a problem… can’t recover from it.

      think about the first case of my cousin… I don’t what can be done… my parents didn’t face problem regarding me coz i never thought of such devastating ideas that could pull others in threat… but if your child do like this.. you are in trouble isn’t? so, there are some techniques at least how to deal with such situations…

      I just wished to be concerned with those situations πŸ˜€

  3. hmm, it’s been a long time to read the post nd cmnts. i m sory for nt leaving any reply earlier.

    we cnt see it in any particular view bt as a whole.hw? ok lemme xplain.

    net nd tech is a part of our day 2 day life. it ws nt so available like now abt a few years ago. so there is a thrust for acquiring the hi-tech lifestyle which has been given pace by media.ppl r watching sat. channels nd trying to follow them u remember, wht djuice did after passing out 4m college ? i think , our generation jst lagged behind abt 2 years for that 3 months!!!

    it’s also tru, kids dnt get physical playground , 4 that, they pass more time on PC.jst go back to ur childhood. u simply cn realize πŸ˜€ .

    nd cell fon ! OMG !!!

  4. See Scenario 1 and 2 are different from 3. Technology cant be blamed if introverts in real life are extroverts online!! In fact its a good thing that due to social networking many good bloggers etc are coming out in the open who maybe reserved in real life!
    As for 1 and 2, yes, there is definitely an influence of technology in making children lazy and couch potatoes and probably “unsocial”. As for reacting violently its more due to teenage than due to technology.

    1. Hmm….
      been cleared now few things…. πŸ™‚

      Thanks Reema for you so nice comment…. It is good if an introvert comes out to expose him/her through internet…. but I focused on a bit different thing– exposing himself on virtual world sensing that he is social enough and it is all to do! may be creating such psychology in them is not any responsibility of technology rather growing up is responsible for it 😐

      and for 1 and 2, you showed the correct cause, their teenage is might be the cause behind their violent reaction…

      thanks again for your thoughtful comment πŸ™‚

  5. it’s all in how much we get involved in anything, Mahmud…your cousin and the others you’ve mentioned don’t realize the limits…there is no single solution…every person has to realize it for themselves and not get addicted to some one thing…life is not just about technology πŸ™‚

  6. There is no doubt that technology makes a kid unsocial but it is not the only reason for the child to be unsocial.

    Now there are no more joint families,what we have is nuclear families where both the parents are working and have only sunday’s for the kids.Parents don’t have time for kids and so that kids don’t get bored,its the parents who teach kids to play on the computer and show them cartoon show on tv’s.Both my sister and b-law are working and kid is 8 years old when they are not at home he is on computer playing games or watch cartoon on tv.

    Because of the increase in population,parks and other creations facilities for the kids are converted into apartments.So there is no play area for the kids.

    Giving cellphones to the kids is because parents want there kids to be on par with the other kids in the school/college.Kids pester their parents to get them mobile or playstation because their friends have it.(this is my personal experience of having a cousin who got a cellphone when he was 15 years old)

    The place i live is very hot and kids can’t go out so they end up in playing playstation or computer games.

    I really feel sorry for the kids 😦

    1. Saritha, the situations you illustrated are all the same in our Bangladeshi societies.. kids don’t have much playgrounds for games…. to pass times… even just before 15 years ago when we wished to pass times out of home, there were minimum chances. But now? impossible. moreover, if both parents are in job all day long, they give their kids a CELLPHONE and PLAY STATIONS so that they could pass times…..
      which was different to me. I had my mom all day long to share my views , had got my sisters all the times like friend, passed sweet times. I am not affected with such things….

      I also feel like you that we have no other options…. I feel sorry for the next generation kids… sorry for the new world…. seriously! 😦

  7. Very valid topic Mahmud. Technology is an integral part of every day lives especially for kids from this generation and on. It kind of replaces hobbies like reading, playing outdoor games etc. My take is that the use technology is good, but must be in moderation.

    Scenario 1 is a very growing phenomenon and due to my lack of interest in tech games, I do not find it a great habit. Then again I am prejudiced here.

    Scenario 2 is an issue with degree of disciple from parents.

    Scenario 3 is not new. People have their degree of comfort in social interactions and online interaction takes much less effort than in person.

    Thought provoking post, keep it up Mahmud.

    1. Thank you Lakshmi πŸ™‚

      actually I thought it to be a discussion.. that is why I shared. All those scenario pained me lot.. but, I am in severe irritation with the third one. 😯

      you find the one part, technology giving chances for one who didn’t express themselves, can do now over this virtual world.. but, scenario 3 is just with me. We stay in University provided dormitories and enjoy lots of facilities…. friends are very close to each other and no prob at all with no excuses that you won’t be able to express yourself… (I believe this life is the most enjoyable and memorable time of our life).. out of all, those who stays away of Dorm-living boys(!!) thinking they are bad (!!) and are in extreme inter-action with the virtual world, I can’t tell anything to denote them! 😯 their outlook is the prob here.. but as he has some friends over internet, he thinks he is very much okay πŸ‘Ώ
      but just imagine! they are kind of psycho-patient and has no friends in real world trust me… I just found it to be happened with them.

      and of course, I agree hundred percent with you that this internet has given many opportunities to express ourselves like I am doing. It is also a blessing that I have got so many friends with whom I can share my views. but I wished to tell that if I’m unsocial in real life, do my society in virtual worlds has any value? I know personally, (thanks God!) I have thousands of friends in real who gifts me a smile while I meet anyone with them…. I love people and I think I have achieved it πŸ˜›

      thanks for your opinion again πŸ™‚ Lotta long reply… 😯 Gosh! what’s going on with me! 😐

  8. There’s a proverb that says “If you overused something, instead of benefiting from it you’ll end up hurt” (this isn’t the actual context of the proverb, but it’s got the same idea). Anyway, the problem with this generation is that they are too dependent on technology that they’ve become misbehaved, impatient and most importantly they lost the essential manners that we go by. So what used to be wrong in my generation and before, is now simply ok!
    It can’t be fixed, because kids are getting worse, unless parents teach their children how to use their five senses instead of relying on technology to do it for them. It all comes down to parenting and the way parents are raising their kids these days.

    Sorry for the long reply πŸ˜›

    1. Thanks for long reply πŸ™‚

      you defined the problem as:
      * technology dependency of new generation child
      * losing essential manners for child
      you told that:
      * teaching from parents are more important to communicate…
      in English.. controversial … πŸ˜›

      though proving you do think of the serious topic

      1. I’m not saying English is not important nor am I saying that I’m not kind of attached to my laptop, but I’ve learned to balance it out. Now let me give you a solution that I’ve seen work in a couple of households. The mother only lets her daughter watch TV for one hour a day, and another hour on the Internet. The rest of the day is invested in outdoor activities, and if not outdoor, its indoor reading, cleaning, studying or family gatherings. The child is a bliss ! She’s absolutely well-behaved and has the most beautiful personality I know ! BTW, the child has a Facebook, Twitter and MySpace account and communicates beautifully in all of those accounts. See, a solution, but the problem is not all parents are like my friend here, so it will always be a problem.

        mahmud faisal:

        Hei Maryam! I am sorry that I didn’t wrote the last 2 lines intentionally! 😯 want to know how? πŸ™„ I felt very tired and sleepy last night and then saw several comments, thought to reply them… πŸ˜› but I don’t know what I told to you regarding “english” thing πŸ˜‰ don’t worry okay? πŸ™‚

        And I am glad to hear about your friend’s family πŸ™‚ this is really depending on the “Mom” in any family in the world– I believe from the core of my heart. She could make her child the way she dreams and expects.. Kids who are in loneliness, makes way to do different something…. they have very little options to judge good or bad, effective or harmful… and very little control on emotion in the teenage! May be there is solution is Mom in many cases ( I believe most of the cases… most effectively, perfectly Mom and Dad can do a lot)…

  9. Technology has come as a boon to us no doubt,but it has its drawbacks like the ones you cited above.

    The only way to curb those is to make optimum use of it.

    goop topic,mahmud πŸ™‚

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